Tuesday, July 01, 2008

people tell me

they have dreams about showing up to work naked or missing the SATs fifteen years later.


here's one i just had:

someone tries to shoot me while i'm getting into my vw. they miss, but somehow shove a dead pigeon in my mouth before they get away. when the cops finally show up, they make me keep the dead pigeon in my mouth so they can figure out what happened. at some point, i finally say (garble) "enough!" and spit out the pigeon.

i plead for something to drink so i can wash out the bird guts and brain sticking with great strength to my teeth. eventually, they show up with a cup of vitamin water iced-tea (which is really disappointing and tastes like plastic have you noticed?) but beggars can't be choosers!

i run outside, swishing the innards out of my mouth and spitting them on the sidewalk. the flood of spit runs quickly downhill (this is san francisco after all!) and the cops yell "no!" because my spit has just washed away all dna evidence they'd just happened upon. they stand up, shoot me a look of horror and dismay, and i slink away, guts still on my tongue.

pretty much sugar plums 24-7 around here.


  1. must be all the murder she wrote and crime dramas!

    also...you drink DIET coke?!

  2. christie3:56 PM

    Um, yikes! That's seriously disturbing. I think we have a shared hate/fear of pigeons, right??

    I frequently have "Oh dear lord, I have a huge paper due tomorrow and I haven't started it" or "What?!? I have a final exam today?" dreams. Maybe it has something to do with the paperwork I STILL haven't finished for school this year?? Oops. I'll get right on that. (After I eat a brownie sundae and finish reading my book)!

    YOU ARE COMING HOME IN 5 DAYS AND I CAN'T STAND IT!! See you so, so, SO soon!!

  3. i know hurray!!! bridey coming in hot!!!

    okay and to answer the DC question - i actually only drink diet coke caffeine free - it tastes okay to me sometimes, like once a month. and only if it's really cold and there's nothing else with a taste to it around the house. b/c water? i don't do it.


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