Sunday, March 04, 2012

Part 2!

Vacation continues! Having fun in the sun (and wind) with the fam damly. Lots of sand in places I'd rather it not be. But here's some more typing from me and my hands:

What do you love most about your husband? Is that the same thing that attracted you to him in the first place? 

I love a lotta things, but... I think what stands out for me is how thoughtful he is. Which sounds like a complete platitude, so let me elaborate. When someone is important to cc, he really works to take care of them and make them feel special. If someone tells him they're visiting a city he knows well, he'll stop whatever he's doing and write a long email with a million suggestions of restaurants and shops to check out. "What was that Ethiopian place that's supposed to be awesome?" he'll ask me as I chew my hair or remain otherwise useless and ask him to please wrap it up, yo. Then he'll furiously type away. I just don't put as much time into those things.
Or he always brings something when we're invited to a house -- ice cream or flowers or something, while I'm "It's cool -- they know we appreciate the invite." Ha. And when it comes to gifts for me or Harps he's the best. Will remember something I said a long a%s time ago or something I offhand mentioned would be good for HJ and it'll show up on a holiday or just because. In general, the dude's always thinking and trying and it wins big points with me. He also says I love you a million times everyday and I love that.

What attracted me to him in the first place was, well...he looked like a movie star? Hmm. I also remember liking that he was in business school and clearly ambitious/interested in being a provider type, but was an unapologetic Democrat. Ha! It was such a nice combo to 22-year-old me, like hey -- I'm a pulled together man, but I also believe in welfare and am pro-choice. And did I mention the handsome thing?

 I want to know if there is anything you intentionally do to allow "you" time amidst all of the parenting you do. Balance is a tough thing and you seem to have it down and I wonder if that is just a natural ability or if you are mindful in particular ways that make this balance happen? 

I don't know if I have it down, but thank you! Somedays I feel pretty balanced -- like I've done the good mom and good wife thing, but also feel happy and centered -- and those are definitely good days. It's something I work at, but at this point it's also semi-natural -- and by that I mean, I figured out a long time ago (high school?) what I need to stay centered and I'm good at finding time for those things. Or else I get really anxious and down.

Often that's only a few minutes here and there, but I have a sort of list in my head and if I can check some of them off everyday, I feel like me and not like I'm living for other people. These include reading, watching cozy mystery shows, meditation, hot baths, talking on the phone to my mom, and quality time with cc (which often is sitting on the couch together, watching the same show and making fun of things). I start to feel myself get depressed if I don't do enough of these throughout the week (like, if I choose to take a nap during her nap and don't choose alone time or if I spend too much time reading dumb blogs and not reading/catching up with family) and I have to take a very determined pause and choose new choices to get back on track.

Will HJ become a big sister anytime soon? 

We definitely want her to have a sibling (or if you're cc, three siblings) and we're aiming for a roughly 3 year age difference. I can't say I'm looking forward to pregnancy and I really, really enjoy having one right now. However, I totally think siblings are a gift and would love to mug on a new biscuit.

What do you wash your hair with?

My little bro just bought me my favorite old shampoo that the Body Shop re-issued. Banana! It's insanely delicious. And I've been known to love love love LUSH's Big shampoo (which is a weird salt concoction that somehow lathers up) as well as hippie shampoo bars that make me smell like a college dorm. I went through a short phase of that no shampoo thing (rinsing with baking soda and vinegar) but then I was all, Why am I doing this?! It worked okay, but I love a good lather after a long day and life is too short for my hair to smell creepy.

 Cake or pie? 

I think pie! This took a really long time to decide. I get to add whipped cream though, right? Because there are few things I'd rather eat more than cold pumpkin pie with copious amounts of whipped cream.

If you had to have three more kids, would they be three boys, or three more girls? 

Oooo...Three more girls, I think. Just because I think it would be nutty and I love having a girl and I'd create our own ballet troupe. Also the prospect of three boys sounds like something I wouldn't be the best at handling. (I'm bad at cleaning bathrooms.) (But I love boys and hope I get to have one!)  

What is your dream car?

Have you ever seen Reality Bites? I love the BMW Winona Ryder drives. It's old and boxy. Yum. I also really love Land Cruisers. But only the old ones, really.

Do you have any projects planned for the future when Harper goes to school and you have more free time? 

Three things I'd really like to get done in the next 5 years: Write a book I'm proud of. Learn to play the guitar so I can do Raffi/Beatles singalongs with the kids. Get certified to teach yoga, specifically to children.

Those are the ones I think about a lot (well, not the guitar really, but the other two) though I get a little manic with to-dos. The other big one that I go back and forth with is getting my masters in a therapeutic field like Occupational Therapy or Social Work. But just can't seem to decide whether that's for me or the more hodgepodge creative lifestyle is. Choices! They overwhelm me!

What song(s) do you listen to to lift your mood? 
Oh, how I wish I could answer this with something cool/hip/esoteric. However, the truth is I either head for 60's pop ("Since You Been Gone" -- Aretha or "I Saw Her Again" -- Mamas and Papas or anything Beatles) or musicals ("Run, Freedom, Run!" from Urinetown or "Right Track" from Pippin) OR anything from Kelly Clarkson's Breakaway album, Christina's Stripped album, or Britney's Blackout album. I feel naked now.


  1. 1. I love the picture up top and got momentarily excited that you had chopped your hair really short and it looked super duper fabulous.

    2. For some reason, I got really excited when you mentioned getting a master's, because both of those things seem so cool and like things you would be great at. But I can see the pull for the "hodgepodge" lifestyle because that is exactly what my daydreams consist of.

    3. I was trying to find music to play for my team for our first practice last week, and it's somewhat of an understatement to say that the kids were disappointed in my music selection. They nearly booed me out of the room when I got to Steve Perry's "Oh, Sherrie." Nothing makes you feel less cool than trying to justify your musical taste to high schoolers, but I'm all for eclectic.

    1. Oh, thank you for saying that about the hair! I'm actually signed up for a major haircut this coming weekend. Nothing SUPER short, but definitely a lot of inches cut off. MY hair is FRIED. So thanks for the thumbs up in advance ha :)

      See it's so easy to go back and forth, right? Masters hodge podge masters hodge podge ah!! Thanks for thinking the school thing might could work, tho -- you and my mom are on the same team :)

      High schoolers would think I was the WORRRRRST. "Hey guys! Cool new artist out! Jim Croce! Let's boogie!" Fail.

  2. Really enjoying these answers.

    "life is too short for my hair to smell creepy" made me snort. Good for you for washing your hair at all, yo. (Nervous laughter from someone who is maybe rocking the every 3 days thing...I am a non-oily person so it's ok-ish? yes?)

    Something to throw out there as someone who also debates what to do when I grow up. I think about going back and getting a counseling degree since I know I liked that/was good at it in the sense that I did a ton of it as a eating disorder dietitian. But I worry a bit about pursing that as I"m a feeling absorber. I try not to (and I would be better at this now that I have kids as I would naturally be less involved with my job) but I internalize the emotions of others. So if I'm around anxious people, I feel that anxiety a bit. Also depression and other off moods. Hope this is making sense - but might be something to consider. Maybe we need to see career counselors in a few years and compare notes! :)

    And I think your "list" of stuff for grounding is smart. I have that, too, but maybe i need to work to define it more. I assume a nap trumps other things, but it doesn't, even when I am more tired. I'm more reinvigorated by doing something I enjoy than sleeping it away in a less-than-restful nap state.

    Anyway, you gave me some things to think about!


    1. I am SO with you on the feeling absorbing. That's why the social work/therapist thing probably won't happen. I keep talking myself out of it and I think with good reason. I think the OT job wouldn't be too taxing in that regard, tho, and might be a good mix of people helping and just straightforwardness. But does it really interest me to the max? I JUST DON'T KNOW.

      Oh and I wash my hair roughly never. Every other day at the most. XO

  3. I love these answers!!!!! Love!!!!

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