Thursday, December 03, 2009

Boxes

Yesterday, our car seat and stroller arrived. I was maybe going to save them for the registry (more on that in a soon-to-come post, I promise), but after realizing I wouldn't be able to even leave the hospital with my baby without a car seat - and the stroller I wanted is a really simple frame that goes with the car seat - I just took the plunge.

I put the little set together last night and oh my little heart just crumpled into a bajillion pieces. There's going to be a little biscuit in there soon! This is HAPPENING.

So anyways. That.

Then, this morning, I'm hauling the enormous boxes down to recycling in the garage. They take up most of the elevator, but it's 10 AM on a Thursday so I'm not feeling too guilty. But then Crazy Lady walks in. I shoulda known! She's always home.

She's in her...fifties maybe?...with a tight bun and Botox and red lipstick and huge Audrey Hepburn glasses and two small dogs and no wedding ring and a shaky voice and I'm afraid of her. I've also spoken with her like 75 times, which made this conversation all the more disturbing.

Audrey: *Cringes* "Ohhhhhh. So. Many. Boxes...."
Me: "Yep." *Crams into one corner* "Sorry about that."
Audrey: "Did you just move into today?"
Me: *Pausing to consider a life where a pregnant lady moves into a fancy high rise alone on a Thursday.* *Looks over at the very clearly labeled STOLLER CAR SEAT ETC boxes. And down at my huge stomach.* "No, I didn't. We're having a baby so this is...baby stuff."
Audrey: *Blinks* *Eyes my belly* *Contemplates her childless life* "Oh. That's...NICE."

I hightailed it out of there when we reached the garage, trying to forget every single Law and Order kidnapping episode I've ever seen. And there are a lot.

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